Last night’s American Idol yielded few surprises. We knew that Adam Lambert would bring down the house. He did. We knew that Megan Joy would suck. She did. We knew that of the seven others in the remaining contestant pool, some would be mediocre good, some would be mediocre sucky, and some would be mediocre middlin’. ??????? ??? ????? They were.
Nevertheless, this Mouse wants to keep Megan around just for eye candy. I believe I’ve said that before. I’ll keep repeating the none too subliminal message in the hope that America will vote for her face and her ass, rather than her pipes. ??? ????? ?????
We’ll just quickly categorize the others here.
Mediocre good: Kris Allen, who sang “Ain’t No Sunshine.” It was original, not just another Bill Withers karaoke performance.
Mediocre sucky: Anoop Desai (“Usher”). Simon Cowell called it a “complete and utter mess.” Matt Giraud (“You Found Me”) and Lil Rounds (“I Surrender”) — the song choice sucked in both cases, and the renditions were not up to par for these two moderately talented individuals. Lil came out wearing her hair in the Japanese-Bahamian pageboy style of the 1960s and 1970s. For that egregious throwback, the Mouse will punish her severely.
Mediocre middlin’: Everybody else. Special shout-out to Allison Iraheta (“Don’t Speak”) who made a stupid song choice. But we like her rock voice and hope she sticks around to do some heavy Pat Benatar, Kim Carnes, Heart kinda stuff. Danny Gokey (“What Hurts the Most”) was not up to his usual par. ???? ?????? ??????? Scott MacIntyre (“Just the Way You Are”) raised the level of his past few weeks’ performances.
Bottom three prediction: Anoop, Megan, and Lil.
At whichever point Megan leaves, American Idol will become a gross waste of time for this Mouse. Absent something to look at, the only real surprise will be which songs Adam Lambert chooses on his way to this year’s relatively uncontested coronation.
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The Redhead says
If you think about it, Sir Mouse, the producers could pull a fast one and NOT crown Adam. Think of the outcry, the publicity, etc.
Nah.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Well, it happened in the past with Jennifer Hudson and with Chris Daughtry. However, this year, we now have “The Judges’ Save” for those who are ripped off by a misguided public vote. I think what separates Adam from even those two previously mentioned very talented individuals is his versatility. His appeal is potentially much broader than either. He’s polished, mature, and professional. Accordingly, I don’t think that even the idiot voters will get this one wrong.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Mouse here.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I’m thrilled about Lady GaGa.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Paula …. shaaaaaaaaaaaaddddddddddddddup!!!
The Redhead says
The Redhead is in the house.
The Redhead says
I closed the bookstore a little early. What are they gonna do? Fire me?
(:
The Redhead says
🙂
The Redhead says
Three points:
Paula is botoxed to the max.
This group sing sux.
Who is Lady Gaga?
(I’ve always hated Journey.)
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Well, Randy probably influenced the selection of Journey. He always looked like a dork playing that guitar. Lady Gaga and David Cook will perform tonight. And Paula is botoxed inside and out.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Good thing the hockey score is 5-1. Otherwise I couldn’t tolerate this.
The Redhead says
I have never heard of Lady Gaga. What a terrible name.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Her real name is Italian and nine miles long.
The Redhead says
Oh, well, that explains it.
The Redhead says
This is silly. Save it for the slumber party, kids.
The Redhead says
I know Sir Mouse is diggin’ on Megan in that red dress.
The Redhead says
Oh, they’re shakin’ things up.
The Redhead says
Ooooooo, cruuuueeeel
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I don’t dig on things…that would mean I regressed to 1975. 😀
The Redhead says
.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Early Ebonics.
The Redhead says
Okay….you’re droolin’ over Megan’s dress.
I think diggin’ sounds better.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
She’s a fine looking lady.
The Redhead says
Yes, she’s very pretty but that tatoo would be a deal breaker for me.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
This is the wrong “Come Back to Me”…not as per the lyrics in my Facebook status.
The Redhead says
This guy hasn’t had a very big career after winning last year.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Well, speaking as a lesbian, I kind of like that tattoo.
The Redhead says
???
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
David Archuleta hadn’t had a large career, either.
The Redhead says
Oh, is that what you were quoting in your fb status?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I took the Are You a Lesbian quiz on Facebook and it told me I was.
The Redhead says
No, he hasn’t. What about Chris Daugherty?
The Redhead says
Well, I could have told you that 🙂
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Dude…dog….got it goin with your Gibson Les Paul and all…so yo…yo Cook…you da bomb!
The Redhead says
Only two winners have really had big careers, right? Kelly Clarkson and Something Underwood?
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I guess that shoots the idea about him not having much of a career.
The Redhead says
So, who bought this album? Other than a bunch of kiddie fan club girls.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Carrie Underwood.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Anyone under 50 is a kiddie fan club girl.
The Redhead says
You gotta see Math Guy’s Prius. It’s sweet.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I’ll see his Priapus when I’m next there.
The Redhead says
Whe I was a teenager I joined the Alice Cooper fan club. It was a big rip off.
The Redhead says
“When.”
The Redhead says
I predict you will give it a “thumbs up.”
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Yeah, he was a dork.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I’m certain I’ll give it a “thumbs up.” It would be rude to do otherwise. This was a big deal for Bob.
The Redhead says
A dork? I don’t think so. He had a great band and put on a pretty good show.
The Redhead says
Yes, it was. But I predict your “thumbs up” will be genuine as in liking the car.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Are we going to hear Lady GaGa or what? Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta is her real name. I looked it up.
The Redhead says
I know it’s genuine in liking Bob.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
I like that squirmy thing Megan did.
The Redhead says
Wow–that is a mouthful. Still, Lady Gaga???
The Redhead says
Aw, Matt is safe.
I didn’t see what Megan did.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Tell ‘im, Meg!!!
The Redhead says
Oooooo, Megan has an attitude.
No foolin’, Megan. You’re in the bottom three.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
She’s now a crow…
The Redhead says
What kind of weird cawing thing was she doing?
I think Megan is a country girl.
The Redhead says
That’s some white pantsuit on Lil.
Allison: safe…not safe…safe…not safe…………….(outfit sucked)……………………
Bottom Three!!! That outfit had something to do with it.
The Redhead says
Adam is safe.
Duh.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
So did her crappy song.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
So, Anoop or Scott…call it….do it…tell me.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Anoop is working up his attitude thing.
The Redhead says
Danny is safe.
For now. Maybe one or two weeks before he gets the boot.
Anook?
Scott?
I predict Scott will be safe.
The Redhead says
Yeah, we called it.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Anoop, with a ‘P’
The Redhead says
Bye bye, Megan.
Just a country girl. Time to go home now, honey. Thar’s pies to make and babies to burp.
The Redhead says
I know. I just like spelling Anook’s name this way 🙂
The Redhead says
Thar’s blueberry, rhubarb, strawberry, pecan, apple, peanut butter…lots and lots of pies…
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
She’s probably a Mormon, too. That ought to give you further impetus to kick her ass out the door.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
The piano looks like a stripper’s prop.
Of course, the Lady looks like a techno-stripper.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Ahhh, now she’s doing the strip
The Redhead says
Man, this is more like Lady Gag-gag.
The Redhead says
Yikes, she’s downright scary.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Helluva dance, ol’ zipper eye.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Megan is mesmerized
The Redhead says
She’s better off goin’ home, or that could be in her future some day.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Megan thinks she’s the eliminee, so she’s clowning around and acting like a dick. However, what happens if she sticks around? She’ll have alienated all the judges and half the audience.
The Redhead says
Megan is playing it for laughs now. She knows her goose is in in the oven cooking.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Well, that future has worked well for The Gaga. Maybe it would work well for The Joy.
The Redhead says
Yeah, she was obviously angry at Kara last night. This evening she has insulted Simon and acted like a jerk.
Way to be classy, Megan.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Goodnight, babe.
The Redhead says
Good for Simon. She’s acted like a jerk. Most unprofessional.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Show Simon what you think of him, Meg baby!
The Redhead says
Man, her looks have gotten her this far. She’s a terrible singer.
The Redhead says
Really tacky behavior.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
WGARA … I’m sad to see the sassy minx leave. I like that edge.
The Redhead says
She’s got a real future.
I hear a diner in her hometown needs help.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Maybe she can do her crow imitation on the Summer Tour.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Don’t be catty.
The Redhead says
Oh please….she’s such a victim.
The Redhead says
I’m allergic to cats so I could never be catty.
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
Oh please….LOL
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
You’re jealous, then.
The Redhead says
Good luck, Megan.
Sir Mouse, it’s been a trip. I’m off to watch the Damages season finale. Remember, tomorrow night, so long to ER!
The Mouse Who Ate Xanax says
OK…next Tuesday and Wednesday I probably won’t be around. Camping and Passover get in the way.
The Redhead says
Oh, okay! I’ll do the play-by-play.
P.S. I have no reason to be jealous.
Have a good one!