It won’t be significant longer than yesterday!

I wish to relegate yet another hackneyed sportswriter cliche to the literary garbage can to accompany “it is what it is” and “controls one’s own destiny” in that abominable collection of shoddily written detritus. Today’s trite construct is:

“If [such and such happens/doesn’t happen], it’s going to be a very long day.”

Writers of such trash need to go back to school —  not only to learn how to write, but also to close the scientific knowledge game caused by them sleeping through fifth grade science class. No matter what the Nittany Lions do today, unless the Mayans are correct, Saturday will be approximately as long as any other day. There are minute variations based on many esoteric astrophysical parameters, but how Penn State’s offense performs is not one of them.

Next on the list, two gems: “at the end of the day” and “the [insert famous athlete name here]s of the world”, not to mention using the present tense to describe future activities.