Blablabla Bowl Blablabla

Nope, you won’t see it here. This Turkey will remain above the fray. No speculation about which bowl Penn State will be going to and which opponent they will face. I’ll just harangue you with some diatribe about the BCS miasma and tell you what I’d like to see happen. No predictions, no decision trees, no attempted BCS mind-reading.

Why? Because it’s all bullshit until the “bids” go out next Sunday, anyhow. Furthermore, it’s about the big bucks now, not about which team is better than what team. So, if Penn State gets a BCS bid instead of Iowa because Penn State’s broader fan base spends more money and generate more TV revenue, that really sucks for Iowa. I don’t want it to happen. It would further serve to expose the NCAA and the BCS as the money grubbing bunch of mercenary whores that we all know they are. Any essence of fairness in selection has always been rationalized in retrospect.

Moreover, d’ya know what tickets cost to BCS bowls? I happened to get a notification today from my local Penn State Alumni Association chapter that if Penn State happened to get an Orange Bowl “bid”, they would have a limited number of the crappiest seats in Land Shark Stadium (sometimes known as Dolphins Stadium, formerly known as Pro Players Stadium, formerly known as Joe Robbie Stadium)* available for $165 each. Like lower level, in da corner, can’t-see-shit seats. Oh, sure, if you have plenty of disposable income and want to party with “the gang”, you just go right ahead. In this Obama Recession, I’m not throwing any more money at these crappy, second-rate, contrived BCS matchups.  Would I go to the Rose Bowl if Penn State were in it? Maybe, but I’ve been there once, so that’s good enough. The SSMNC game? Never been to one. If Penn State ever manages to get into it, I’ll probably go. But an Orange Bowl for $165 if it turns out to be a comedy of errors between two also-rans like 2005? Faggedaboudit!

The Turkey lives in Orlando. The Citrus Bowl (oops, I mean the fucking Capital One Bowl) would make more sense. Tickets cost half as much, and the opponent would probably be more entertaining — a top three SEC team. Not that the Nittany Lions are likely to beat them, given this year’s special teams morass, the ineffectual offensive line, and the easily beaten defensive secondary, but it would mean a helluva lot in the off chance that they do. I have been hoping for PSU-LSU right here in the Citrus Bowl.

That’s my two cents on the matter. Now, I’ll STFU.

*Wasn’t the Orange Bowl a lot more fun when you knew the name of the stadium it would be played in — the Orange Bowl — and it had nothing to do with selling package delivery services or crappy, vogue beer?