Looking back at the past two cluster fuck Penn State football seasons, I must ask the musical question: Are we only dreaming?
As you know, your favorite turkey is an immutable cynic. Those past two seasons, coupled with the hopelessness of a long-term deal for James Franklin, daunt my spirits, leaving me with more questions than answers.
Anticipating an impending football season has long inspired The Nittany Turkey to crank up expectations around this time of year. I have been writing this drivel as an email list since the early 1990s, with this blog dating back to 2004. Recently, my enthusiasm has waned, either due to the weariness of old age, or just being tired of my hopes getting dashed early in the season.
Caught in a Dream
Accordingly, I’m not going to venture a won/loss prediction in advance of this season. I’m completely clueless about this team and its capabilities. I’m just Caught in a Dream, and that’s not too Swift.
We’ve lost some talented players to the NFL Draft and the dreaded NCAA transfer portal. We’ve had some highly ranked draft classes. We’ll have Sean Clifford starting in his 6th or 7th year of manufactured eligibility. Anyone who thinks he can make a concrete assessment of where this bunch of Nittany Lions is going is full of shit. Anyway, that steaming turd flies out the window on September 1, when Penn State loses its season opener to Purdue.
In Dreams, They Walk Alone
For my money, or lack of same, the offensive line still begs more questions than it provides answers. It has been a piece of shit since John Urschel and Donovan Smith left in 2014 and 2015, respectively. You doubt that? Then I have two words for you: Paris Palmer. When the NFL Pro-Bowlers departed, Paris Palmer, a mediocre JuCo transfer, was Penn State’s big answer. A quintessential “traffic cone”, the 6′ 7″, 300 lb dead weight from North Carolina just stood there most of the time. When Saquon Barkley was tearing up defenses single-handedly, he was doing just that, all alone. He had scant assistance from the Cones. But I digress. Are we looking at yet another crappy offensive line this year?
Money Changes Evathang
In the pecuniary world of college football in 2022, it doesn’t matter whether you win or lose, but how much money you make. If you can put a crappy product on the field, yet still garner huge attendance numbers that keep the rest of the league happy, then you’re doing your job. However, the fans don’t give a shit about how much money you’re making. They just want their team to be in the playoffs. Anything less is failure and cause for suicidal ideation.
Penn State has long left its lofty perch atop the Big Ten East. (Actually, it was never a perennial top finisher, but has been known to have had a few good years since joining the conference in 1993). One could advance the pandemic argument for 2020 and 2021, which saw our beloved Lions lose more games than they won within the conference. Yeah, if you want to delude yourselves, you’ll cry COVID. From my perspective, they would have sucked with or without the dreaded virus. In any case, some of the presumed successes of prior years were deceptive. The 2016 Rose Bowl season was the high point of the past decade, albeit culminating in a loss to USC.
Mr. Sandman, Bring Me a Dream
As for national rankings, this once proud football program has finished in the top twenty-five just nine times between 2002 and 2021. As for the top ten, the Lions have reached it only six times in the past twenty years, with only one of those being in the top five (2005). Playoffs? Psshhhhaw!
In the eight years of the James Franklin Era, half of those years have concluded with non-winning records of .500 or below in the Big Ten. His Bowl record is equally putrid (3-4). Penn State gets invited to bowls even when they suck, because they make money for all concerned.
Penn State fans are divided into realists and stubborn idealogues. The realists admit that PSU has seen better days, while the hopelessly romantic idealists cling to the glory days of the past and think we’re just a position or two away from getting back there. This Turkey is a realist. Aerosmith’s epic classic bounces around in my bird brain. Dream on!
The Turkey writes his column sporadically throughout the year, but he tries to make snarky comments before and after each Penn State football game. As for this season, in the words of the noncommittal parent, “We’ll see…”
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David Mullin says
I agree with your comments. I’m a 1974 PSU grad and have been an avid PSU fan since I was a teenager. I have been to many Penn State bowl games including both Rose Bowls, two Fiesta Bowls, the Orange Bowl and the Alamo Bowl, which was Lavar’s last game. Every Penn State alum I talk to is utterly disgusted with the program. It was unbelievable that the University gave Franklin a $60 million extension. For what? Beating Rutgers? The bizarre thing is that despite the bad results, Franklin keeps churning out good to great NFL players: Parsons may well have been the best player in the 2021 draft; they had 14 guys drafted over the last two years, and 6 of them went in the first two rounds. That can’t keep up because kids are not going to keep coming for a losing program. The PSU football program is being destroyed before our very eyes.and that is very sad.
The Nittany Turkey says
David, my PSU days were back in the Rip Engle Era. We had our moments back then, like beating OSU 27-0 in Columbus in 1964, but nothing can beat JoePa’s first 20 years to create a jaded fan base. We all had every right to maintain lofty expectations year after year back then, so when The Dark Years came, followed by the sporadic successes of 2005-2011, we believers knew that the Lions would roar again — it was only a matter of time. Well, times have sure as hell changed, haven’t they? Now, we can count on middle-of-the-pack finishes in the conference, and sometimes, we even fail at that.
You’re right about the consistent production of NFL stars by Penn State. One would think that good coaching would enable the team to excel, given the talent produced by top-rated recruiting classes. Good coaching? Dream on.
I was at the 1994 Rose Bowl, when Ki-Jana Carter ran roughshod over the Ducks. That was the peak for PSU and for my fanhood. Too bad it was only two years into the Big Ten membership, and it’s been hit-or-miss (mostly miss) ever since.
—TNT
Todd Allen Sponsler says
Hello Turkey! As I grow older, our opinions of PSU football are getting closer and closer. Like you, I have been blogging a long time–starting back in 1999 on a platform called Xoom. In retrospect, maybe that was the cause of the dark years as Minnesota rained on my parade and 12-0 prediction that year. Might have been 13-0 since we added Zona. Now we have Zoom meetings almost 30 years later. I always considered myself the quintessential optimist (some think I’m an optometrist, but technically I am an ophthalmologist.) My PSU glass was always half full to start the season. Nay! Overflowing! Many years I proudly predicted undefeated seasons only to see our hopes dashed somewhere between Labor Day and Halloween. Like you, my interest has waned significantly the last few years, and really, quite honestly, since JVP was sent to pasture to die and ignominious death in forced retirement (which was imminent due to health issues anyway. The post-Paterno era under O’Brien was mildly interesting but more due to the politics. We were playing not against Ohio State, but Emmert and Delaney. Penn State football didn’t die. But–IT IS NOT THE SAME. I was debating blogging a few weeks ago. The Big Ten added USC and UCLA. Greed, despair and agony on us! Who cares? It’s just one or two more losses a year for us. If this Pandemic doesn’t end, we may never get rid of Clifford. Will there be a monkey pox extension? The NCAA can’t even keep players at one school or keep them from getting paid (Paterno couldn’t even buy a kid a burger back in the day–my times have changed!) How can they keep players from playing for 10-12 years? Oh right. Most leave after one or two anyway. Except for the playoff games, the bowl season is a joke. I’m reluctant to defend Franklin, but it’s hard to win a bowl when most of the stars with stars you recruited wimp out for fear of getting hurt and losing millions of moolah. Come to think of it, college football is no longer the same. Oy vey! We sound like a couple of disgruntled old farts. Grumpy old Bloggers. And for good reason. The good old days really were good, and a heck of a lot better than the crap we’re paying for now. But your post makes me feel like I should pick up the gauntlet and blog again. We’ll see…..
The Nittany Turkey says
Welcome, Todd, to the world of disgruntled old fart PSU cynicism. I’ve seen it building in you since the Michigan game several years ago, when you threatened to give up blogging for good. But you’re like Rob Gronkowski, the Phoenix of blogging, so you’ll be back. Your Long Covid might have demotivated you temporarily, like it did with your suspension of pool maintenance. The pool and the blog will return. I’m counting on both. Do I get an invitation to the pool party?
Maybe with the new regime taking hold at the Patriot-News, you could revive the Lion’s Den there.
Time marches on, and it seems to have left the aforementioned disgruntled old farts in its backwash. The pecuniary bullshit is the antithesis of what college football should be, although the sainted Paterno believed that pseudo-student athletes should be compensated. Despite the fact that he couldn’t buy them a hamburger, he bitched enough about it, and he was a strong proponent of paying their spoiled asses. He also used a few tricks to get them some scratch.
I remember the long-forgotten Rob Bolden tweeting, “Gonna get a new car when my Pell Grant comes through.” I tweeted back, “I thought Pell Grants were for tuition, books, and essential living expenses.” He tweeted back, “No, you can use it for anything.”
Hypocritical pretenses are no longer necessary. We’re in the full-on SHOW ME THE MONEY era, and it will rage southward unabated.
As for PSU this year, see Big Al’s following commentary. He used to be a pessimist like me, but his predictions this year are so optometristic (sic) that he must have put on the rose-colored pince-nez. (I didn’t really mean that, Al — just making an eye joke).
My thoughts are that anything better than 6-6 will be a gift from the gods.
Come back!
—TNT
Big Al says
Turkey, it’s good to see you haven’t stopped blogging and seem to have even picked up some new readers. I gave up dreaming about Penn State football several years ago. Under Franklin, they’re not going to beat any teams that have equal or better talent and they’re going to lose to at least twice to teams that have inferior talent.
So what does that mean for the 2020 season? It means that the ceiling is an 8-4 regular season record followed by a loss to some random SEC team in their bowl game. The most likely scenario is that they will be 6-5 going into the final game against Moo U. I have no idea how that game will turn out – mainly because I don’t know whether Moo will be any good this year. Auburn, Michigan, and Ohio State are almost certain losses – and two more losses will come from some combination of Purdue, Minnesota, Indiana, and Maryland.
The Purdue game should provide some indication of how well the Manny Diaz experiment will work out. It’s really tough to open against a talented quarterback with good offensive coaching when you’re trying to learn a new, more “aggressive” defensive scheme. Worst case scenario is that the linebackers and safeties will have a game experience similar to Hackenberg’s 2015 Temple game.
The Nittany Turkey says
I’m back, and I’m more ornery than ever. Good to see you, Al. As I told Todd above, I believe anything better than 6-6 is a gift from the heavens. My expectations are lower than the Trieste.
One thing I might look forward to is some revamped pass coverage schemes. I’ve been so sick and tired of the soft zone coverage that dates back to the Sandusky Era, which must cause Pavlovian salivation among OCs in the league. Like Clifford, O’Connell is in his sixth year. Highly regarded. We’ll see how Manny defends against him. We’ll see…
—TNT
PhillyZman says
Hey Nittany Turkey…
Glad to see you’re back!!!
I think you hit the nail right on the head for this year!!!
After last year’s loss to Illinois, the season went down the shit hole for me!!!
This year… 6-6 or 7-5 or 5-7… what the hell is the difference? No matter how you look at it, we’re a 500 team the last two years!
Do you believe anything Franklin says? I don’t know about you, but I’ve tuned Franklin out!!! Everything he says, he’s full of shit!!!
Just the mention of his name makes my blood boil!!!
The one thing I cling to, is the new AD Kraft didn’t hire him, and he has no loyalty to him! A few more seasons like this, and how much longer does it take to get rid of him!!!
And when he talks about loyalty… ask his former agent about loyalty after he dumped him… ask Sandy Barber about loyalty after she gave him that contract and what he said about her when she’s gone!!! The phony bastard!!!
Who is he going to blame next? We deserve better than him!!!!
I’m sorry for venting my anger about Franklin. Maybe this is not the time with the season just starting, or the place… YET!… but I’ve seen enough of his coaching!!!
I’ve got my fingers crossed for the Purdue game, but I won’t be surprised if we see the same old shit!!!
Take care Nittany Turkey!!!
The Nittany Turkey says
Zman,
Don’t hold back! You won’t find any disagreement here. When Franklin opens his mouth, what comes out is indeed bullshit, yet somehow, he has bamboozled the powers that be (or that were) into signing off on that huge multi-year extension, which will keep Franklin coaching at Penn State until after this Turkey shuffles off this mortal coil.
Perhaps there is hope in the notion that you suggested — Kraft’s perceived success or failure will hinge on the football team’s performance, so how much Franklin mediocrity he will tolerate, no one knows. If Kraft decides (along with the woke administration) that Franklin must go, it will be an uphill fight. The buy-out would be costly, in any case. I hate to see that kind of reward going to a guy who over time bats .500. The best out will be if they catch him screwing somebody’s secretary or a student. Not likely, but as long as we’re grasping at straws…
I am interested in seeing how the Manny Diaz project works. I hope DC doesn’t wind up being a revolving door like OC.
In any case, at season’s outset they can still be 12-0 and be playing in the Rose Bowl. How’s that for unbridled optimism — or more likely, temporary insanity!
Be well!
—TNT
Drozz says
Zero confidence in Franklin. He talks a good game and gets the recruits, but pretty soon people notice results. Usually me and my PSU friends VRBO a place 15-20 miles out and make it a long weekend. Last year only 4 of us went into the Auburn game out of 15 that attended the tailgate.
Nobody wants to go up for a game this year. Culmination of non-football distractions in the stadium, costs, time, Franklin, etc.;
there’s just no payoff.
When the end of the Franklin era comes, people will look fondly upon an 8-4 season and the eventual loss to an SEC team.
(I read my post in the voice of eeyore and it made me smile.).
Anyhoo, I’m glad everyone here is back and in good health!
The Nittany Turkey says
Hiya Drozz,
Yeah, how many top recruiting classes can Dear Old State squander before the administration starts to realize that James Franklin is no Allen Iverson. (I pulled that out of my ass. They used to call Iverson “The Answer”). Franklin is not The Answer. His coaching is more the question than the answer. I don’t know where the hell I’m going with this, but we all seem to agree that Franklin has worn out his welcome, had his honeymoon, and hasn’t shown shit.
Now that his Fairy Godmother Sandy is gone, how will he fare. Will he somehow inexplicably get into the good graces of our new AD? I don’t know how he’ll manage to stick around otherwise, given his putrid record over the past eight years and the horrible mistake of extending his contract. Must have involved some kind of extortion. That’s the only plausible explanation.
Would that your 8-4 prediction come true… I dunno. I dunno shit about these guys. What I do know is that Franklin must go, and it’s not that I want to make the coach the scapegoat for the team’s crappy performance. Franklin has squandered superior talent and has bulshitted his way to job security.
As long as we’re going to compete against UCLA and USC for money, make an offer to Urban Meyer. LMAO!
—TNT