The Nittany Turkey

Primarily about Penn State football, this is a tale told by idiots, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.

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Game Seven: Go Pens!

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Tonight, at the Joe Louis Arena in Detroit, the underdog Pittsburgh Penguins will face off against the favored Detroit Red Wings for the biggest prize in professional hockey, the Stanley Cup.

Game Sevens are special moments in all sports that employ seven-game playoffs to determine champions. Game Seven is the ultimate do-or-die game, with desperation on both sides. Lose it and you go home. There is no tomorrow. Don’t leave anything in the locker room. Make no mistakes. All those sports cliches apply.

There have been fifteen Stanley Cup final series’ that went seven games, with the visiting team winning Game Seven only twice. The Penguins are the visiting team in this Game Seven and they can cement a place in the annals of NHL history if they pull this off tonight.

However, in the previous six games, the home team has always won. The last game played in Detroit was a 5-0 embarrassment for the Pens.

Pens forward Petr Sykora injured his foot in his first playing time in a month during Game Six in Pittsburgh. He probably will not play, most likely replaced by Miroslav Satan.

Marian Hossa, who jumped off the Penguins’ ship after last year’s loss in the Stanley Cup Finals in order to give himself a better chance of winning the Cup, has underperformed in this Finals series. It would be good to see that underperformance continue. Meanwhile, the Pens’ captain and star, Sidney Crosby, has been similarly absent for the Finals. He needs to step up and surmount the frustrating Red Wings defense in this do-or-die game. My challenge to Sid: Play the best game of your life and then flip a bird at Hossa while skating around the rink with the precious cup!

That leads us up to the official Turkey Poop Prediction for Game Seven of the Stanley Cup Finals Series between the Pittsburgh Penguins and the Detroit Red Wings. But first, let me say that this game is this Turkey’s last real sports excitement until the football season cranks up in the fall. The NBA Finals don’t thrill me much (sorry, Magic) and baseball hasn’t held my interest since 1994. So, I’m ready for the most excitement since Super Bowl XLIII. Back to the business at hand: Vegas has installed the Wings as odds-on, 1-2 favorite, with an over/under of 5.5. Bah! Humbug! 2-1 is a nice payout. I’m going with the Pens, who will win 4-2 and fill that 35-pound cup with IC Lite before flying it to its rightful home in the Mellon Arena. GO PENS!!

Who wins? Who cares? What’s hollow?

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Well, one thing is for certain: American Idol will air its final show of the season tonight and I probably won’t get to see much of it. There’s a basketball game that garners more of my interest. However, it starts at 8:30, so I will be able to watch the first half hour of mindless hype. I’ll augment this with occasional look-ins, particularly at halftime, but otherwise, I’ll rely on the astute commentary of The Runnin’ Redhead to track the progress of our two Idol aspirants.

Not only is this latter day incarnation of Ted Mack’s Original Amateur Hour scheduled for two interminable hours, but also America’s Sweetheart, Ryan Seacrest, warned us last night that it would most assuredly run long. Those of you who stick with the whole thing to see which one of these two guys whose CDs I would never buy anyhow will win this thing generic diazepam daz 10mg deserve a medal from the Queen. Wait, that’s Adam Lambert. Well, fine, he and Kris Allen are both hoping that people actually watch this thing.

There’ll be B-list entertainers, there’ll be former Idols, there’ll be sardonic pranks played on people, and there will be aspirants who bombed out in the auditions brought back for more ridicule. Perhaps we’ll get to see the bikini babe again. We’ll certainly see the top-10 in the audience and perhaps on stage. Well, make that you’ll certainly see them. I’ll be watching King James decimate the Magic. There’ll be duets with famous B-list singers who have CDs to plug. Rumor has it that Cyndi Lauper will be singing with Adam. Whoop-de-doo!

In the end, all the hoopla leads up to the selection of this year’s Idol. Will it be Kris? Will it be Adam? In the end, it makes no difference. What’s hollow?